Embracing Life

I was on amazon the other day and found a book called The Happiness Project .  I read a snippet and decided that I needed to work on my own happiness project.  Now, I am not the type to make big resolutions at the start of a new year, because I used to make a big list and then give up after a few days   weeks..  Rather I like to focus on one new thing, big or small, each month.  January was a small start - washing my face every night before bed.  Doesn't seem like a big deal, but I wear make-up on most days so my co-workers can't see how exhausted I really am.  At night, I was getting quite lazy about removing my make-up, so I made it my January resolution.  February was a bad month with the kids being sick quite literally everyday, so nothing really got done.  I did however attempt to get more sleep.  Most nights I am in bed by 10.  Still no where close to 8 hours a night, but it's a start.  March was used to focus on ...

Bedtime for the twins is 7 p.m.  Bedtime for Connor is between 7:30 p.m. and 8 p.m.  So why, at 8:40 p.m., was I still hanging out with three kids in the twins' bedroom???  Because I am a sucker. I just don't know what Colin's deal is.  When you put him in his crib, he screams bloody murder while you try to walk out the door.  And he got his sister in on it too.  Now she cries until I come back in and lay on the floor.  In fact, they point to the floor and refuse to stop crying until I lay down.  Yes, I know it's a bad habit.  But unless I want Colin to scream all night, and I really think he would, I don't know what else to do.  I know he had some separation anxiety a few weeks ago.  And ear pain from the chronic ear infection he had, but since he's had the tubes, he doesn't seem to be in pain anymore.  I've tried night lights, no lights, door opened, door closed, shades open, shades closed, me in my bedroom so he can see ...

"It is good to appreciate that life is now. Whatever it offers, little or much, life is now - this day - this hour." ~Charles Macomb Flandrau I was able to take a personal day on Tuesday.  It was a long time coming.  I had previously scheduled it for back in March, but it was a busy time at work (well let's be honest, it's always a busy time at work) but the kids had been sick, and I had been missing a couple days here and there for them, so I felt like I shouldn't miss another day, even though this time the day was for me.  And since I was trying to schedule it on a Tuesday (because the twins are at daycare and Connor has school/does errands with MIL on Tuesdays), it got pushed until the end of April.  Even this week wasn't the best, because Colin got tubes on Thursday, so that meant I was missing two days of work in one week, but I didn't care.  I needed a day to myself.  Do you know I haven't been alone in my house for more than 30 minutes since Ja...

You drive half way to your destination realizing that the whole time, the Wiggles CD has been playing and there are no children in your car. You go to work with a Mickey Mouse bandaid on your finger. You make sure all three of your kids have outfits that match, the diaper bag is packed, coats and hats and shoes are all on, yet you are almost to Target and realize you aren't wearing a bra. You are so hot from running around and getting things ready to go that you aren't even wearing a jacket, so you can't cover up the fact that you are not wearing a bra. You have extreme interest in how the contents of a diaper look. You don't know what it's like to eat your dinner while it's still warm. You decide that since your husband is gone for the evening, it's easier just to feed your kids french toast sticks for dinner than try to make something.  You throw in a banana for good measure. Since you don't like french toast sticks, especially since this is the...

Background: I was talking with a co-worker about her granddaughter today. Her granddaughter, E, was born a month after Connor. Connor will turn 4 in July. E doesn't talk. Well, she babbles a lot and she says her little sister's name, mom, dad, a couple of other random words, but she doesn't talk-talk. She doesn't have conversations, she doesn't explain to you what she wants. My coworker, D, has said for a long time that it worried her, but her daughter, C, tends not to listen when D makes comments about the way she lives her life. E's little sister was born a few weeks before the twins, so she will be 2 in June. She also has an E name, so I will call her E2. E2 was born with spina bifada. They knew about this before she was born, and she was rushed into surgery a few hours after birth to fix some things. E2 doesn't walk. It took D's daughter a loooong time to get E2 into physical therapy. D doesn't know why. D's daughter lives in my neighborhood....

There comes a time in every child's life where his/her mother/father/whoever has to step back and let the child play unsupervised.  Clearly, however, the time for my children is not now.  When you leave the twins and Connor unattended for more than 3 seconds, wonderous things happen.  Games, such as, "Let's see who can run on the couch the fastest" and "I can climb higher than you" take place.  Keira also enjoys "Give me back my toy or I will bite you" although she doesn't actually tell the sibling she is going to bite, you just see her lunge at someone with her mouth open. I should mention though, that even when the children are supervised (by the parent who is not me), fun things happen too.  I came home a few weeks ago to a piece of beautiful crayola artwork.  On the front of my oven.  The drawing was created while the parent who is not me was a few feet away, making dinner.  Or when the parent who is not me was ...

Or, things I should write down in their baby books but I never have the time to pull the baby books out of their closets because I am too busy chasing after them… Connor – 3 years, 9 months: Connor sitting on my lap, after getting yelled at for hitting his sister, and asking me, “You happy Mommy?’ Laying in bed with him at bedtime and Connor asking me to say prayers. Connor being so excited to help his Daddy make dinner. “I help Daddy make dinner tonight!” Connor asking, “What I help you with mommy?” When you ask Connor if he is a big boy, he will say, "No, I'm Connor." He told me the other day he played in the gym at school with "all my friends." I needed to keep him busy one afternoon, so I gave him a large poster board and some crayons.  When Keith got home, he proudly stated, "Look Daddy at my project!"   Keira – 21 months   When Keira sees a hair tie in my hair, she will pull on her hair and say “pretty”, letting me know she wants a ba...

It seems like in the past couple of months, Connor's verbal skills have increased ten-fold.  Enough to the point where I actually will ask him to please stop talking for a minute (or ten!) Here are some of our conversations: Connor: Mommy, you go to work tomorrow? Me: Yes, I have to go to work tomorrow. Connor: Oh.  Can Daddy and I come to your office and eat Panda like last time? (Last time refers to 9 months ago when Keith and Connor surprised me at work with Panda Express.) ******** Connor: Are the babies older yet? Me: What do you mean? Connor: When they are older, Nana and Bumpa can take everyone to McDonalds to play. They can't go yet because they are babies. And we have to take Nana's car and Bumpa's truck so there are enough seats. ********* Me:  Here are two Hershey kisses.  (Connor asked for some Easter candy.)  Don't tell Daddy I am giving you two of them. Connor:  Okay Mommy. Minutes later... Keith:  Hey bud. Connor: Hi d...

Last night, as I was rocking a sick little boy, trying to wait for a cue he might throw up, (those cues I missed the night before when he did throw up, all over me...), I thought back to a conversation I had with my mom on Easter. We were at my grandma's house, and she was resting on the couch. We were sitting in the middle of the chaos of five children, 5 and under, running around and creating general mayhem. Out of the blue, my lovely mother said four very shocking words: "You should have another." I looked around in general disbelief, wondering who she was talking to. I could see my three children: Connor, fighting with his cousin Lexi, over who got which Mickey figuerine (they were basically the same), Keira, marching around singing her made-up song and eating a pretzel stick, crumbs flying everywhere, and Colin, standing on a small chair and falling backwards into my arms because he thought was a fun game, over and over again. I responded with, "Thanks, but ...

I love my husband. He is a wonderful father. He spends time with the kids every day. On those rare occasions where he works late and they are in bed by the time he gets home, he talks about how it sucks that he missed seeing them. He cooks us dinner every night and even does the dishes! However, on Saturday, I actually said to him, "If you weren't their father, I don't think I'd let you watch my kids alone." I didn't mean it to be harsh. In fact, he even agreed with me. The following event actually took place: On Saturday, while the twins were napping, Connor got out his moon sand (it's like moldable sand) and was playing with it on the kitchen table. Some of it got on the floor, and some of it got on him. I stripped him down to his pull-up (potty training is a work in progress) in the kitchen. He asked to go watch "CARS". Keith was in the kitchen with us. Me: Can you take him downstairs and put on Cars? Keith: Sure Me: And find him some clothes ...

Easter Baskets: Rockstars: Trying to recreate last year's great shot (Connor was purposely pouting, and Keira started saying "cheese!" moments after we put the camera away...) Everytime we go to my grandma's, she asks, "Do you think we can get a good shot of all five kids together?" And everytime, I say, "Probably not." Someone always has to cry:

They all have been beasts this afternoon, so while I wait for them to actually fall asleep, I thought I'd post a few pictures from the past week: Yes, that's Colin wearing a stocking cap on a 78 degree day. At least he took the mittens off before I snapped the picture. Keira's first time with painted nails. If you ask her to show you her "pretties" she puts her hands out.

Dear Beloved Twins of Mine, We need to have a talk. I think you two underestimate the importance of bedtime. Not for you, but for me. Your mommy. I know bedtime seems to come early to the both of you, but one would assume that after a long day at daycare, preceded by a long night where you two partied it up, that you would both be exhausted and fall right to sleep. However, that was not the case. Let's discuss the unacceptable behavior from last night: It was warm last night, that's why we left the window open. Yelling out it to the neighbors = unacceptable. Spitting water at each other, thus soaking your pajamas, bedding, and somehow - the carpet on the other side of room = unacceptable. Screaming as though I was beating you just because I had to take off your soaking wet pjs = again unacceptable. Dropping books (Colin) and your lovey (Keira) behind your crib - more than one time - and then saying - "uh-oh" and "oh no!" = as cute as it may have been, still ...