Friday, April 6, 2012

Reflections (and my 400th post)



In 2001, I was working three jobs and going to graduate school. I had been single for about a year, and if I wasn't working, I was hanging out with my sister and a couple of friends.  We did lots of fun yet meaningless stuff: concerts, Denny's, laughing at ourselves, and tattoos.  I could lay in bed and devour Anne Rice's The Witching Hour with no other responsibilities calling to me.

That girl is gone.

In 2002, my boyfriend (now husband), Keith, knew I was looking for a new job. He found an ad for the college where I currently work. I applied for two positions, was offered both, chose one. It was part-time, but allowed me to focus on my graduate studies and still have a life outside of work/school.  I wore funky jewelry, had red hair with black "highlights", smoked on my way to work, and did other meaningless (but fun) things.

That girl is gone.

Yesterday I received an email from work. This month, I will be honored for 10 years of service with a dinner and a gift. 

That makes me feel old.

Somehow, along the way, a part-time job turned into a full-time career.  Now there is a husband, three children, and a mortgage. Car payments, school tuition, and daycare bills.  A cup of coffee on the drive into work. I still wear cords and funky jewelry, but there are no more tattoos, no more fun hair - because there is no money for frivolous things. I read books on parenting and sensory processing disorder (with the occasional vamp thrown in).

If I could talk to that girl I used to be, what would I tell her? Have more fun? Date more guys?

Savor every moment.

And if that girl could talk to the woman I've become, she'd tell her - Just wait. You'll be busier, but life will be so much sweeter. You will miss the meaningless, frivolous things, but you will gain so much more.

Just don't forget me.
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