Thursday, January 24, 2013

What I'm Reading...

Today, one of the writing prompts at Mama Kat's is 

"What are you reading?"

This is something I can easily write about!

I have a tendency to read 1-3 books at a time, 
so depending on my mood, 
I have a choice of what to read.

 This book is great! 
It's a new-agey type book with tips and tricks 
for removing negativity from your home.
For the record, 
I think it's completely normal to use crystals, essential oils, 
as well as feng shui to help create balance in your home.

Because the countdown is on...
Only 62 days until Blay and Qhuinn's book comes out,
so I'm starting a re-read of Books 1-10

And yes, this is the December issue.
I'm a tad behind with my magazines.
I'm also a tad behind with working out this week...

Mama’s Losin’ It

Friday, January 18, 2013


So gather around
And see what the day brings

And see what makes you laugh

And see what makes you sing

And never, nevermind

The thing that people say

You'll never go away

You'll never go away 

It's amazing how a song - the lyrics, hell, just the tune, can take you back to that time. All the feelings come flooding back as though it was yesterday that you were standing there in the park and the words that could never be taken back were said. The world came crashing down and there was nothing but sadness and then darkness.

 ...and you never know just how dark this screen can be...

The ever-gnawing feeling of emptiness that sat like a rock on your chest, crushing you so hard that it was tough to breathe. So you cut and you fought and you cried and you died...  wondering if the sun would ever shine again. Wondering if you would ever smile again. Wondering if the hole in your soul would heal or if it would just be a gaping wound forever...'s just a matter of time....

It's amazing what time can do.

Lyrics by Brad - one of the best bands no one has ever heard of...

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

A few of my favorite things

I try to participate in Leigh's 52 Weeks of Happiness when I can. 
But it's been awhile.  
So I've compiled a list of things that are making me happy these days.

My new Keurig
And my new fancy k-cup holder!

My bright and shiny Kindle Fire
(Look at all those beautiful books!)

Lavender and Chamomile lotion
(And that funky item in front is a coffin sent to me
from Mary Shelley... ;) )

My grandmother's bracelet

Penguin artwork by Boy

Monday, January 14, 2013

Monica's Closet

I'm a pack rat. Not the kind that has piles of newspapers blocking the doorway to the living room, but the kind who has a hard time throwing things away. It was always manageable... until I had kids. You see, we bought our house with the intention of having two kids.  However, sometime around November 2007, God gave me the two for the price of one feature.

The things about twins... they need a lot of stuff.  You think one baby has it a lot, imagine two of EVERYTHING. Well not quite everything, but pretty darn close. As we needed to make room for two cribs or two swings or 18 million toys, I was stuck with trying to find places for the existing items in the house.  And like I said, I can't throw things away. (I blame my mom for this disease.) So rather than Monica's closet, I had Sarah's office (but there is no door). And Sarah's laundry room (that one has a door). And I had a lot of clutter.

Did you know that clutter can drain you emotionally? I've tried explaining this theory to Keith, but he's easily distracted by the bright shiny computer or the ear-piercing scream of a child who is mad because another child took the legos even though the screaming child wasn't even originally playing with the legos...)  Anyway.... it can drain you. And it can drag you down. The heaviness of all those THINGS - and that's what they are, just THINGS - caused me more stress than I realized. 

Rather than make resolutions for 2013, I made an action plan. And the goal of that plan is to focus on me. Because I'm awesome and I deserve it. 

My mantra used to be "embrace chaos" because that was the only way I felt I could make it through the craziness of my life at the time. But now, it's time for a change. 

My new mantra reflects what I want to accomplish this year:

Peace, Health, and Simplify
There are a lot of ways that I can achieve what I want - learning to say no, stop trying to please everyone but myself, become a better wife and mother... but I'm starting with the closet. And the office. And the laundry room. And the toys. 

I've thrown away or donated quite a bit so far, but I'm not done yet. It's amazing how much lighter I feel.